so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
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