You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Randomize