butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
