vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
