Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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