If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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