it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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