How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
