I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
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If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
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Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf