Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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