absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Randomize
