She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
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Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
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When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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