not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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