exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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