Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
