a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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