So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
i black out too much to be "responsible"
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
