No, drunk sperm still make babies.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
