I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
