At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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