Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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