She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
