what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Randomize
