She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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