I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
everyone is single if you try hard enough
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
