it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
