Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
3 2 1 whiskey
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Randomize
