I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
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