can u get pink eye on your cock?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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