i permit you to call me
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
