Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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