OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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