The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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