listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
smell my finger.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
