You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
