I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
