He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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