Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
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I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
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Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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