It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
