Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize