gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize