We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
