Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Randomize