I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Randomize