did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
