How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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