I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
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Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
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Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..