Texts From Last Night

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  (916): View more from California

  I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.

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  (916): I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time. http://tfl.nu/hsnu
  Replies (14) Good night (4307) Bad night (699)
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  (909): View more from California

  do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?

  (760): View more from California

  and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook

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  (909): do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"? (760): and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook http://tfl.nu/nbai
  Replies (28) Good night (4956) Bad night (844)
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  (909): View more from California

  he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"

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  (909): he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman" http://tfl.nu/jaxb
  Replies (79) Good night (1644) Bad night (7037)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.

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  (954): I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother. http://tfl.nu/rbuh
  Replies (9) Good night (2779) Bad night (1640)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.

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  (208): if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that. http://tfl.nu/41po
  Replies (3) Good night (2256) Bad night (843)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"

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  (301): Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles" http://tfl.nu/ewys
  Replies (7) Good night (1509) Bad night (991)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began

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  (425): Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began http://tfl.nu/trvz
  Replies (2) Good night (526) Bad night (845)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?

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  (217): I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty? http://tfl.nu/8wnt
  Replies (5) Good night (1447) Bad night (610)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there

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  (856): the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there http://tfl.nu/b4jk
  Replies (4) Good night (904) Bad night (1300)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.

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  (201): I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me. http://tfl.nu/s5ef
  Replies (0) Good night (1054) Bad night (392)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.

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  (727): We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity. http://tfl.nu/gy6t
  Replies (4) Good night (896) Bad night (324)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.

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  (256): Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards. http://tfl.nu/ejyy
  Replies (2) Good night (993) Bad night (322)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  someone just got arrested on campus...

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  holy fuck look at all that cocaine

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  (908): someone just got arrested on campus... (908): holy fuck look at all that cocaine http://tfl.nu/ymqg
  Replies (0) Good night (930) Bad night (360)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job

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  (410): Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job http://tfl.nu/zapx
  Replies (3) Good night (494) Bad night (277)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.

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  (+44): I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it. http://tfl.nu/3p08
  Replies (0) Good night (159) Bad night (61)

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