I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
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I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
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You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
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