Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
