So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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