How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Randomize
