We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
