You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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